Big Brother's Bigger Mother

I was well p****d off with the Big Brother result. Look at this thing that won the final. A spotty little Stoke Newington anarchist-tree-hugger-looking guy of the sort who attends anti-war demonstrations outside my flats and shouts obscenities at decent law-abiding people like Linda and me. He only won the competition after thousands of ultra left readers of this site came out to vote tactically.

Readers will know from the article posted by my spoof impersonator that I supported Aisleyne who represents everything decent and attractive about the young people of today. I must admit that my backing for her was not just on political grounds. I hope Linda doesn't see this, but if I'm honest I really quite fancied Aisleyne. You can see from the picture that "she's my kinda gal".

Oh well, there's always Love Island. Maybe I'll get luckier there.