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Thursday, May 08, 2008

Dog Tags

I'm not a great fan of tags - the online equivalent of chain letters - but other kids didn't often invite me to take part in playground games when I was at school, so I'm really quite chuffed.

Jane escapes on a coach full of returning PolesI've been asked to tell you six random things about me by the former Labour MP for Reading East, Jane Griffiths. I hope that I don't get into trouble for responding to her request as the former GCHQ linguist is currently on the run from HM Customs and Revenue and Reading County Court, having done a bunk to Latvia rather than appear in the dock to face bankruptcy charges. She now claims to be working for "a European institute in Strasbourg". I can't imagine what that could be, but I suspect she may be getting advice on avoiding prosecution from Peter Mandelson.

At risk of being associated with controversial, deselected, conservative, bankrupt, absconding Labour MPs, here goes:

  • I like pork scratchings (can you tell?);
  • I came 42nd in the Kent Schools three-legged cross-country egg & spoon race in 1984;
  • my second toe is longer than my big toe (this is called Morton's toe and is the main reason why I can't run fast);
  • my favourite computer game is Resident Evil 4 (I always play the Mayor, badly);
  • I have an A grade in Religious Studies O Level (not bad for an atheist and very useful for when Augustus is old enough to need a decent secondary school);
  • my favourite holiday destination is C├│mpeta in Andalucia, a village extremely popular with former members of planning committees for some reason, and where I have an apartment overlooking the sea.
Meanwhile, Crudas supporter Will Parbury has instructed me to:
  • Pick up the nearest book
  • Open to page 123
  • Find the fifth sentence
  • Post the next three sentences
  • Tag five people and acknowledge who tagged you
The Prince, by Niccol├▓ Machiavelli, (published 1515)

P.123, fifth sentence:

Gordon Brown - the "listening" Prime Minister"A prince, therefore, ought always to take counsel, but only when he wishes and not when others wish; he ought rather to discourage every one from offering advice unless he asks it; but, however, he ought to be a constant inquirer, and afterwards a patient listener concerning the things of which he inquired; also, on learning that any one, on any consideration, has not told him the truth, he should let his anger be felt."

Next three sentences:

"And if there are some who think that a prince who conveys an impression of his wisdom is not so through his own ability, but through the good advisers that he has around him, beyond doubt they are deceived, because this is an axiom which never fails: that a prince who is not wise himself will never take good advice, unless by chance he has yielded his affairs entirely to one person who happens to be a very prudent man. In this case indeed he may be well governed, but it would not be for long, because such a governor would in a short time take away his state from him. But if a prince who is not experienced should take counsel from more than one he will never get united counsels, nor will he know how to unite them."

I'm tagging:

Paul Anderson
Dave Osler
Susan Press
Kerron Cross
Luke Young
and, because I can't count up to five correctly,
Alix Mortimer

3 comments:

L Patterson said...

The Gordon Brown knock-knock joke.

Knock-knock.
Knock-knock.
Knock-knock.
You're supposed to ask "Who is it?".
Sorry - I wasn't listening.

jane said...

hi Luke, ta for the publicity but you have it wrong. I am not on the run from anyone and I work as an editor at the European Court of Human Rights, whose views I most certainly do not represent in my blog.

Luke Akehurst said...

Glad to hear that your finances are in better shape than those of the Labour Party, Jane, with the consequence that you are no longer on the run. And also pleased to discover that your favourite friends these days are very similar to your erstwhile colleagues in parliament, only with four legs. If I ever need help with my human rights, I'll know where to come. Or maybe not.