Army Chief Of Staff Declares War On Tony

According to the US media earlier tonight, British Army Chief of Staff General Sir Richard Dannatt has called for British troops to withdraw from Iraq "soon" or risk "catastophic consequences" for both Iraqi and British society.

In an unprecedented broadside against the Government's foreign policy, the General stated that the continuing presence of British troops "exacerbates the security problems" in Iraq.

This man is clearly guilty of treason and must be arrested immediately. This is not Burma, North Korea or Pakistan. We cannot have soldiers telling the government what to do.

In any event, what the hell does he know about Iraq? Who are the Green Howards, anyhow? Some sort of environmental lobby group? And to judge from this picture of him receiving a presentation portrait, he's clearly some sort of nervous wreck, falling apart.

He should be put into secure detention without delay. As we don't have any room left in the prison service, I suggest we intern him in an army camp, preferably well away from the British public. How about somwehere like... Iraq?