Once Upon A Time In Stoke Newington

... well about a month ago to be exact, there was a Hackney Labour councillor of many years' standing who was very keen to shout about his admiration for Tony Blair, Hazel Blears and Lorna Fitzsimons on his website. But then Tony was forced out by Gordon Brown (supported by Jack Straw and Thicko Watson), Hazel came bottom of the poll and was promoted from Labour Party Chair to Junior Minister for Flood Damage and Lorna retired from politics to become CEO of the Israeli Government UK Lobby Company Ltd.

Mind you, there were some personal setbacks also. The Councillor didn't get nominated as a replacement for the self-promoting celebrity rebel Diane Portillo in Hackney North & Stokie, was not selected to stand for the equally safe seat of Walthamstow, and was not chosen as a London CLPs' rep for Labour's National Policy Forum.

But the Councillor was fortunate enough to be nominated by Dave Spart as one of Britain's three "thinking bloggers", alongside the "blindly ultraleftist unaligned revolutionary socialist" SouthpawPunch and the economics geek Chris Dillow at Stumbling and Mumbling. If this wasn't bad enough, Spart added: "I don't think he really is a Blairite."

Then Gordon Brown was elected without opposition and Harriet Harman won the Deputy Leadership contest, so suddenly bits of the Councillor's website disappeared in an electronic puff of smoke, replaced by praise for his new hero Gordon and sudden flashes of admiration for the "It" girl.

Ha ha. Very funny. Not. Obviously I would never write anything like that - exposing my own lack of principles and my willingness to brown-tongue anyone who can help me climb the greasy pole without my having to sound too left-wing in the process. So what on earth was my spoofster thinking when he parodied me with attacks on Ealing Councillor Gurcharan Singh like this and this. Obviously if I were to write anything like that there would be floods of satirical comments. It just goes to show that people shouldn't try to spoof other people until they have got right inside their heads. Otherwise they just make themselves look stupid. And nasty, unpleasant and hypocritical.

Whereas, of course, I am none of these.