Join the Blue Ribbon Online Free Speech Campaign
Fighting threats from Stalinists and Fascists to use court injunctions and physical violence to silence free speech
The working class can kiss my arse, I've got the Councillor's job at last
The Luke Akehurst blog - The genuine Luke Akehurst weblog about politics, elections, the Labour Party and that ghastly Hackney place. Ignore counterfeit Luke Akehurst blogs - this is the genuine article from the chap who whips Hackney Labour councillors in his spare time.
Now with extra added ingredient Linda K Smith. Helps wash your family whiter!

"My favourite film is Dr. Strangelove, Or: How I Learnt To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb" - Luke Akehurst
"Funny and clever but not particularly nice" - Time Out
"With added foie gras, steak, soft cheese, claret and port (hic!)" - Luke Akehurst
"In gustatus perquam putidus est" - Vatican Bank
"Not so much 'Who's Who?' as 'Who's Sleeping With Whom?'" - Peter Mandelson
"You can judge a blogger's politics by the colour of their blog banner" - The spoof Luke Akehurst
"By a coalition of Trots, tree huggers, anarchists, Tories and a nasty little clique over-excited about my hair colour" - Luke Akehurst

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Courtney Coventry Claims "Lord Levy Offered My Husband A Gong"

A month ago I offered commiserations to "glamour celebrity" Courtney Coventry for Britain's discourtesy in not inviting her back for a second session of questioning over "cash-for-honours".

This was despite her (then) recently launched website indicating a preparedness to engage in intercourse with the new Justice Minister. As the gorgeous pouting Courtney said at the time: "I'm more than willing to talk to Jack Straw any time, especially if I'm given sufficient advanced notice so I can brief my PR company to arrange the necessary photographers and journalists from lifestyle pullout sections and lads' mags".

Yesterday the CPS quite correct decided that nobody should be charged in respect of the absurd allegations that Labour offered rich people gongs in exchange for donations and loans to the Party. Nobody in their right mind would believe that any of the fine upstanding accused could possibly be guilty of such criminal offences. I can only echo the words of my spoofster yesterday when he said "Lord Levy is a good man who has spent his life engaged in fundraising for charities and good causes - one of them being the Labour Party" and "I am delighted that he has been vindicated".

Now, in an act of spite at our unwillingness to give this American the free publicity she is obviously seeking, Courtney Coventry has published outrageous claims about Lord "Who said I'm only having one glass of champagne?" Levy on her website.

This is just a small extract:
"I'd like to engage in some serious intercourse with Jack Straw"
Baroness Coventry

"Lord Levy grabbed my husband's arm and pulled us over to one side, saying to Mr. Blair that he had to discuss something with us. Lord Levy then asked my husband to confirm an amount he would donate and how grateful 'Tony' would be. My husband said that we were not ready to give a commitment to a figure but we would consider it over the course of the next few days. Lord Levy then proceeded to push further and said that, given the right amount (he mentioned £500,000 and £300,000) he would make sure 'Tony' would have John [my husband] put on the honours list. We were more than a little taken aback, but before we could fully register what had been said Lord Levy called Mr. Blair over and said that we were going to make a substantial donation to the party and then added that he was sure we could arrange an honour for services to the party. Mr. Blair looking a little embarrassed nodded and smiled..."

Clearly this is a serious challenge to sales of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows". I bet people were queuing round the block to buy a new laptop just to read this opportunistic drivel. It's about time someone acted to stop this sort of thing. The nasty little anarchist who runs this website has been whinging on about the CPS decision and calling for a private prosecution. Well, I say: "It's not the upright and decent Lord Levy who needs to be prosecuted, Mr Guido Fawkes/Paul Staines/whoever you are, it's the spiteful "glamour model" Courtney Coventry who needs to be prosecuted. Let's get her in front of a judge so the truth can come out.

1 comment:

Dick Grimble said...

Were there any other conditions attached?