"Old Blogger" Piper - Obituary

I was about to write a piece on the Honorary Right Honourable Robert Piper, M.P. - never a man with whom you would associate the word "retiring" - when, to my astonishment, I heard this morning that he is hanging up his blogoboots.

I am deeply depressed to lose this worthy (well, almost) adversary.

I couldn't say in all honesty that Bob Piper and I have always been best mates. He liked to refer to me in his inimitably avuncular manner as "my comrade from the right of the Party".

Even in recent months, when we've got to know eachother a bit better after our encounter at G-MEX, he has attacked me savagely from the safety of his keyboard: here, here, here, here, and here.

And it would be disingenuous of me not to admit to having reciprocated here, here, here, here and here.


Bob's decision was, according to his blog, a result of the torrent of abuse he received recently when the revolting little s**t PragueTory whipped up debate about his tiny little mistake in publishing a black and white minstrels spoof.

I mean, it was hardly the biggest gaffe in political history, was it? And we all make little mistakes when it comes to matters of ethnic sensitivity.

I once wrote an article in which I incorrectly spelt "Caribbean" and "Kashmiri" and referred to the small clique of African Caribbean members of Hackney Council Labour Group as "Afro-Carribeans". But the abuse I received as a result didn't make me quit blogging, did it?

I must admit that I do rather think the Sandwell Tyrannosaurus is being a bit too touchy on this one. I mean, he clearly thinks that he was on the receiving end of a tirade from which there was no defensible position.

He should have listened to the Radio 4 "Today" programme this morning. Poor old Margaret Beckett had to endure a full five minutes of trying to justify the Government's policy in Iraq in the face of the conclusions of the US Government's Iraq Study Group report.

If you have RealPlayer installed on your PC you can listen for yourself here.

At times it was hard to concentrate for falling about laughing. Margaret must surely be invited by Colin Murray to take part in next Saturday's "Fighting Talk" on Radio 5 live, so she can show off her talents on "Defending The Indefensible".

It was a masterful performance.

She hardly flinched while making the most preposterous speech since Anthony Eden proposed the Oxford Union motion: "We could keep control of the Suez canal with half a dozen well-armed boy scouts, a school dinner lady and a stout plimsoll".


So my message to you Bob is this.

If Margaret can face that sort of grilling, keep smiling and head off for a nice caravan holiday, surely you are over-reacting to your little blogging farrago.

After all, you are just a little councillor in a place most of us have never heard of. But Margaret Beckett is responsible for the security of the nation.

Linda... Is that right, Linda? OMG!